Domestic Violence is NEVER funny. But…

Imagine a drunken version of THIS coming at you in the wee hours of the morning throwing punches and cursing like a sailor.

That’s right, Yanni got caught. According to the police report, Yanni used language that would make Metallica’s James Hetfield blush. According to the initial police report, during the course of an evening, he called his live-in love a “whore”, a “c*nt”, and told her to pack her things in garbage bags, because she was garbage. You can see the whole report here:
One thing about that Yanni, he takes a heck of a good mugshot.

So… the most shocking thing to come out of all of this? Yanni’s real name is John Christopher. That’s right. With a name like that, it’s clear that our Greek hero may have hatched from the same alien eggsac as John Tesh, which would explain the musical style and odd facial hair. Here I was thinking Yanni was 100% exotic new age chanteur to the core, but alas, dreams are shattered every day…

But take heart! At the end of it all, as we here at knew all along, our man Yanni is innocent as Cottage Cheese (and I don’t even know what that means.)
The official word –

Note: no monies changed hands. Take THAT Michael Jackson! That’s right, fool! Yanni is straight up innocent, which means in this case, the idea of domestic violence is indeed funny!

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